Being real is a struggle for me. I crave it from others, but it's hard to give someone the very real and raw side of me when I don't feel like they're going to give me the same thing in return. It's very for me to turn on the "charm" and to negate any talk that's deep. If I don't feel like you want to talk about deep things, I won't talk about deep things. I simply give what I get.
But we are not called to live like this, this is not how Jesus lived! Jesus didn't worry about whether or not people were comfortable with his authenticity. Jesus wasn't waiting to make an eternal impact. Jesus was born perfect and lived a perfect life -- therefore we see in His like that being real came natural to Him. He was tender, compassionate, loving, merciful, understanding, real, authentic, prayerful and holy. So in our lives (speaking to myself here), I wasn't born perfect because I am human, but I will live my life learning to reflect Jesus. Whether it's comfortable and socially acceptable or not, I will strive during my life to reflect Jesus in everything I do and say. I don't just want to be "real", I want to live worthy of the calling I have received.
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Honestly, it's human nature to feel anxious about the future. But in your heart, when you stay in these feelings of anxiety, fear, and loneliness. Satan will attack you, so be ready! The enemy thrives when you think God has left you, he (Satan) loves it when you believe God is not true to Himself or to His word. So, you need to be aware of these tactics from the enemy and be ready to combat it. Satan will try to get you to take control. He will try to convince you that God has abandoned you and that you need to take the reigns of your life back, after all, it is YOUR life. When Satan comes, and he will, your job is to tell him that "It's actually not your life at all, it's God's!" In these moments, lean close into Jesus. Even though everything around you might seem dark, God and His words are the only light you need to follow.
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